Wednesday, February 4, 2009
I don't have control
Reality from Monday's nights close call to delivery finally set in last night. I was sad and close to tears coming to grips with the reality that I don't have control. I know that seems like a no-brainer. I haven't had any control with this pregnancy, why would I think that I did. I'm not sure. I'm doing everything I can to be healthy, to grow the babies, to ensure the safest course for their arrival, and while that matters it does not give me control. THEY will decide when to come. I want to make it to 36 weeks, but that is just a want. I realize that. I've always realized that, but the reality was something that was a little farther from my reach. I'm doing what is best for them by being in the hospital and being monitored 24/7, but they will make the decision on when to come. I'm grateful for every day that I am able to remain pregnant and they are able to continue to thrive in the womb.
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3 comments:
Hang in there, you are doing great. So many moms would be giving up by now or not fighting as hard to make it to 36 weeks.
I agree you are doing GREAT!!!!! I know you know it will be SO worth it! Saying all that - I think everyone had some meltdowns. My stay was extremely uneventful & I did very well - but still had a few melt downs. Hard being away from my husband, kids, & just alone - but NOT alone. ya know.
Blessings,
Thank you ladies. 32.5 weeks today. Taking it day by day.
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